Why I do Theatre

Tonight we finished another show. Fantastic show, sold out seats. I found myself backstage at one point just sitting back and watching people, and thinking about what is is that makes me want to do this.. What is it that gets me to that audition where I literally shake with nerves? Why do I make this commitment to practice night after night? Why do I put myself through long boring tech rehearsals where the air conditioning breaks, and my make up is melting off? This summer alone I have spent most evenings learning songs, blocking, trying Russian accents, making props,  and wedding veils. This summer alone I have missed out on time with my family and trips to the beach, all for the show. Why? 

After a lot of thought...here is why.

I do all of this because when I'm standing on stage with blinding lights in my face, and I am singing my heart out; I get the most amazing feeling. It's not the feeling that I am so stinking amazing, and everyone loves me. It's the feeling that I am part of something amazing. I am part of something.. special. This "family" has come together, and created something unique to us, that people enjoy to watch. It feels good to be good at something, and it feels good to be around other people who "get" that.

My amazing friends that I get to work with :)

Every single person on stage is there because they want to, they love to. Everyone has their reason to be there. Maybe they are there because they have dreams of being on Broadway. Maybe they got talked into it for some reason. Maybe they go because they need to get away from their family. Maybe they are just curious about what it is like. For me, theatre is my time to be "me". Its the time where, for those few hours, I am not a mother, busy cooking dinner and playing "dance show". I am not a teacher, writing lesson plans and grading papers. I am not worrying about my husbands job, or my family's problems. I can just be me. I can just escape all the demands and worries in life. Don't we all look for that "escape"? It's the time where I get to be "me", but I also escape me, and become someone newI think in  doing this, creating this other reality, it actually helps me understand and appreciate my own actual reality. It gives me perspective, and helps me deepen my understanding of what it means to be human.

Besides all that deep stuff, I also do it because it is fun! I feel like I am a kid again, playing with my friends. We laugh every single show. We laugh when I forget to take the black make-up off from the previous scene, and it looks like I have sideburns. We laugh when that guy says that line that sounds ridiculous every single time. We laugh when the fog machine leaks and we slip and fall (ok, that was more scary). We laugh when I get hit in the head with the backdrop, or I wack an orchestra member with my cane as I walk by. It's FUN! It's hilarious, actually.

At the end of the night when we smell like a middle school locker, and we're all talking about who forgot which line, or which prop went missing, we all are completely exhausted. We all come back because, after all is said and done, it was all worth it.